Amber Wolfe supported her son through multiple surgeries on his abdomen after ulcerative colitis changed his life, helping him with nearly every daily task and his medical care for weeks at a time as he navigated recovery from the surgeries and, temporarily, life with a colostomy bag.
“I had a flow chart of when he could take medicine, when he couldn’t take medicine because he was on so many different medicines at the same time” she said. “I cooked his meals, which he had a special diet because he had his colon removed, so he had to eat a special diet. He had to eat six to eight meals a day. I would do his laundry, and he had a lot of laundry as he got used to his colostomy bag. I helped with hygiene, with everything.”
Navigating all of that was hard, but Amber and her son, Senior Airman Morgan Stoneking, found humor in the situation, even cracking jokes after accidents like when he drank soda and the carbonation ruptured his bag, a mistake they never made again.
“It’s just something you have to look at and laugh, like, ‘Oh, okay, we won’t make that mistake again,’” she laughed.
They also shared easier moments, like sitting on Morgan’s apartment patio.
“We would sit out on his back patio, and his view off his apartment is of the mountain range,” she said. “So we would sit there and just look at the mountain range and enjoy being outside.”
Amber flew from Springfield, Missouri to Albuquerque to support Morgan two times, for three weeks each time. While the Air Force flew Morgan to Cincinnati for his surgeries and back to Albuquerque, it was Fisher House’s Hero Miles program that made sure his mom could fly to meet and support him.
“I told him, ‘I’ll find a way to get out there. If I have to drive there, whatever. I will be there. I just need to know when you’re going to be there so I can be there at the same time. I’ll figure the rest out,’” she said. If she’d actually had to drive, it would have been 12 hours each way from St. Louis.
Amber worked with New Mexico VA Fisher House Manager Carlos Velasquez to plan her flights through Hero Miles. With United Airlines, those long drives became short flights so she could focus on Morgan.
“Flying was absolutely phenomenal. Carlos, in Albuquerque, he would send me the vouchers in an email, and I would just walk in, go through security. We were on time and had no delays other than weather, and [United] even held my connecting flight in Denver to make sure I made it on time when my first flight was delayed for de-icing.”
Those flights made a tough time easier for the family.
Morgan ultimately needed three surgeries to remove sections of his colon and rebuild it. He no longer needs the colostomy bag and is having a great recovery. Unfortunately, a new clotting issue can only be managed with medicine, which will likely push him into medical retirement. Mom and son are looking at the next phase of his life as he pursues new training and work.
Through the Hero Miles program, Fisher House uses donated frequent flyer miles to purchase round trip airfare for wounded, injured, and ill service members on ordinary leave from the medical center to home or an authorized event; loved ones of wounded, injured, or ill service members to visit the authorized medical center; and loved ones to attend the Dignified Transfer of Remains at Dover Air Force Base.
